6/28/2011 04:08:00 AM

Pinky Swear

As a follow up to the post from last night...

1. Will I sleep through the night lol? (only time will tell...)

I think I did. I haven't looked at the actual sleep log on my fit, but I don't remember waking up often...

2. Is using a natural supplement just a way for me to deny that I am starting to abuse laxies (and other diet aids like Energy drinks etc)? I mean... I don't actually *need* any help this time, I just used it to meet a certain time table.
 
Yes, it was (past tense!). I won't stop with the diet pills,or the tea per say... but I will only use things as they are intended to be used... (ie... diet pills are intended to be used daily. so that's ok! Stimulant laxatives, even if "herbal", are only intended to be used when you are backed up....). The only exception I can think of is an ECA stack... since they only way I can get the ingredients is through other medications.

3. Am I blurring the lines I've drawn a bit too much?

For some things yes, other things... tbh... I don't really care.

4. How different is hypothetically allowing something to happen from making it happen?  
It's different, but it isn't really better. That said, I really don't see that situation happening really, so I'm not too worried about it.

I was up more today :( and during part of my shift where I was the only person in the store the senna kicked in... so I had to shut it for a few minutes to uh... take care of business. and there was a lot to take care of so... I'm telling myself that the weight HAS to be water/food that hasn't passed all the way yet.... I really hope so, because like I said, I feel smaller (Just a bit).

Tomorrow I will do a SW Flush to clear out everything and weigh in just to be sure... (Blurry lines? Maybe... but there isn't a stimulant involved which is what causes IBS or many of the other associated probelms, right? right... )  I kinda feel I deserve the discomfort and all... I have also allowed myself to stop eatting the bran because I just couldn't make myself do it after the gain....

Anyway, the point of this post was to promise that I'd be as safe as I can be, and use things only for the reason they are meant to be used...

<3


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